Baby Boy is in the Right Spot!
- Jeanne
- Jun 29, 2019
- 4 min read
We have an update! I am currently (almost) 15 weeks pregnant. Baby Boy is in the right spot (no ectopic!) and growing as he should. If all things go as we hope, we’ll be welcoming Baby Boy in December 2019.
Thank you all for your support and for hoping with us. These last 4.5 years have been tough. We can’t imagine how we would have gotten to where we are without your support.
On April 5, we had our frozen embryo transfer. Starting about a week before the transfer, I began taking estrogen (pill) and progesterone (scariest shot).
I also did about 6 sessions of acupuncture leading up to the transfer. My doctor decided that I was to go under for my transfer (not routine). So no food or water after midnight! I was terrified. Trent and I both wore our lucky pineapple gear (hat and socks) and our Hope Together shirts. The transfer went off without a hitch.
The next few days, I took it easy, watched funny movies, and snuggled with Owen. The “two week wait” is one of the most stressful. You have no idea if what you just spent a gagillion dollars on worked or if you are facing another loss. This time, we knew we had a normal embryo, and we knew that it was our only one. What if it didn’t work? What would we do?
My beta test was scheduled for April 15. A Monday. I had heard it was better to wait until you had your blood test with the doctor (beta) and that you shouldn’t do an at home test. If you got a negative, you would be stressed. If it was too light, you would be stressed. But I did not want to wait on pins and needles, while a work, and possibly hear sad news. So I tested the Friday before my beta. And Saturday. And Sunday. They were all positive!! (And getting darker.)
Now if you know our history, a positive pregnancy test does not bring joy. Sure, we had passed a first hurdle (the transfer “took”), but would it last? Was our baby in the right place? Would I start spotting or having symptoms of miscarriage. I was not ready for joy or celebration, but was cautiously hopeful.
On Monday, April 15, I had my blood test (and breakfast with two of my besties). What felt like a million hours later, my nurse called to tell me that my beta test was positive. My HCG number was 124. My doctor wanted it to be over 50. The nurse was so excited and seemed like she didn’t understand my caution. Two days letter they retested me to make sure the beta number doubled. It was 299! Again, the voice on the phone didn’t seem to understand why I wasn’t jumping for joy. I was still nervous. Still cautious. Our next hurdle was our first ultrasound. Trent had never seen a heartbeat and neither of us had seen our baby in the right place.
Also, I kept taking home pregnancy tests. Trent made me stop. (They’re expensive!)
The weekend before our first ultrasound, I had to give myself a shot at Midway airport. No fun!
On May 1, we had our first ultrasound. We saw our perfect little embryo snuggled in the perfect little spot with the perfect little heartbeat.
Between our first ultrasound and June 6, we had a number of ultrasounds. Each time I’d get nervous and worried. I’m constantly reminded how fragile all of this is and how even perfect babes are sometimes lost. But each of our ultrasounds showed a perfect little embryo in the perfect little spot with the perfect little heartbeat. On June 6, we graduated from our specialist.
I had to get the shots up until June 9th. Trent was a champ, and so was I. More and more I gave them myself. On my way to my work cation, I had to give myself a shot in an airport bathroom again.
This process has been so many things. Scary and hopeful. Full of tears and full of excitement. So many families try this and fail and somehow we are here at 15 weeks. Hoping for 40 weeks. Hoping for a baby in our arms. We are mostly “out of the woods” statistically speaking. But, honestly, statistics haven’t really worked in our favor these last few years. 8 early losses, 4 of which were ectopic, and 2 of those corneal ectopic. All of that is so extraordinarily rare that I still hold my breath a little when talking about Baby Boy being with us in December.
Pregnancy loss and infertility robs us of so much. Thank you so much for giving some back. For giving us hope and hugs and generous generous gifts and beautiful tokens to let us know you are thinking about us. We are so thankful for you.
Baby Boy has so many that already love him. I feel like he will have the biggest family ever. We can’t wait to continue to share our struggles and joys and hopes with you. We ask you to share the same.
I’ll end this blog with our latest Sleeping At Last inspiration.
SON
show me who i am and who i could be. initiate the heart within me until it opens properly.
slow down, start again from the beginning. i can’t keep my head from spinning out of control. is this what being vulnerable feels like?
i swear i'll try, try, try to breathe ’til it turns to muscle memory. i'm only steady on my knees; one day i'll stand up on my own two feet.
i’ll run the risk of being intimate with brokenness. through this magnifying glass, i see a thousand finger prints on the surfaces of who i am.
show me where to find the silver lining as the mercury keeps rising, ’til the glass or my fever breaks.
show me how to struggle gracefully. let the scaffolding inside of me be strong enough to hold this tired body up once more.
and i will try, try, try to breathe ’til it turns to muscle memory. i feel the pressure in my blood building up and liberating me. so i will try, try, try to breathe ’til it turns to muscle memory. i'm only steady on my knees. but one day, i'll stand on my own two feet.
i'll run the risk of being intimate with brokenness. through this magnifying glass, i see a thousand finger prints
that ran the risk of being intimate with my brokenness. i was given a gift of hope in a thousand finger prints on the surface of who i am.
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